Gluten Deficiency: The Taboo Epidemic

An infomercial with our partners Scrottfroght’s “The Brand You Can Trust”

New research indicates that a “silent majority” of the world’s population may be suffering from a deficiency of gluten. Our medical correspondent Dr. Stig Andersen NVQ summarized the findings as follows:

“The continuing trend in being visibly gluten intolerant has stigmatized gluten to the point that most adults are now not getting enough of this essential nutrient. Unfortunately, intolerance is viewed as a fashion accessory; it’s no longer acceptable to go to a restaurant with friends without reciting a list of allergies and dietary restrictions, often accompanied with a description of symptoms. Our friend gluten is now very much the enemy due to it being a de facto addition to many “it gives me watery diarrhea” lists. Certainly, any admittance of gluten deficiency would be a terrible social faux pas

To combat this taboo epidemic The Turunn Tribune has partnered with Scrottfroght’s (Sweden’s brand leader in herring-related products) to create a new gluten supplement. And here’s the clever part: to ease social acceptability the product is labelled as a “Gluten-Free Diet Support” allowing it to be eaten freely in any situation without fear of stigmatization. Of course, the label does disclose the product’s actual contents–100% pure gluten powder refined from herring bones–in small print on the back of the container. If you are currently experiencing any of the symptoms of gluten deficiency–weariness, itching, gastrointestinal discomfort, heartburn, hair loss, unusual involuntary verbal outbursts, swollen wrists, red blotches, or a pronounced limp–don’t bother about asking your doctor, just buy this supplement and reclaim the missing zest in your life!

 

 

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