Mexican Border Wall Unveiled

A prototype of The Trump administration’s Mexican border wall was officially unveiled this week. The wall is designed to look “very American and welcoming”, a white picket fence around the Land of the Free. Don’t be deceived by its homely appearance however; according to blueprints, the fence will pack a massive 24000 volts in alternating current, pumped into its pickets by underground high-tension cables. This voltage will be enough to fry immigrants and Border Patrol alike if they pass within 20 feet of the quaint perimeter, providing an effective deterrent to would-be immigrants.

The barrier is undergoing testing in its Nevada location prior to construction in earnest slated to begin in August 2018. Volunteers from the undocumented Mexican community are invited to participate in the testing, with a guaranteed H-2B visa and generous stipend offered to those chosen for preliminary trials.