Alzheimer’s Overtaken by Insidious New Epidemic

Alzheimer’s disease is no longer the number one age-related neurological illness, losing its dubious crown to a condition that has been known for many years but never given the attention it merits: The Yips.

Fueled by an aging population and the spread of golf courses, The Yips has become endemic in areas of Florida, Arizona, Ireland and Scotland. Recent studies have raised the specter of golfer-to-golfer transmission, a previously unthinkable possibility now playing out on the fairway. The disease has also crossed the sport barrier, affecting thousands of baseball players, and experts worry that it could continue to propagate to other pointless bat-related sports, like cricket or croquet.

CDC neurologists believe that the insidious spread of The Yips is in part due to its name. If it had been called something more serious-sounding or scarier, like “BTS” or “Corbyn’s Disease”, it might have got the attention of the public and the medical community before becoming pandemic. Alarming statistics released by the American Golf Association show the effects of the infection rate, with worldwide golf handicap indices rising dramatically for the first time in more than 30 years.

The CDC are now paying real attention to this threat and are stockpiling Overlap Grips in special centers in the affected states. The Turunn Tribune will keep its eye on this ball over the coming months to keep you informed of this significant new health menace.