Sports


Tour de Beardstein

Summer is here, Scandinavia moves from permafrost to permasun, and Swedes everywhere enjoy traditional pastimes of hunting drunk Norwegian itinerants in pine forests with crossbows and cycling through tundra to look for thawed squirrels. To celebrate this outdoor…


China to Host all Future Olympic Events

In a shock statement issued earlier today the International Olympic Committee announced that all future Olympic events–both the summer and winter games– will be held in Beijing, China starting in 2022. FIFA have also made it…


BMI “Pandemic” warns CDC

Health officials are waking up today to a new global pandemic in the form of BMI, a previously overlooked threat. BMI is a particularly cruel affliction targeting health-conscious people, typically middle-aged gym-goers trying to fit…



The TTT 401K: No Fees, No Enrollment, All Welcome!

To mark the discovery of the possible health benefits associated with running, The Turunn Tribune is delighted to announce its first annual 401K Family Fun Run. The run will begin at Madison Wisconsin’s ridiculously oversized…



Extreme Sandcastling: Style in Spades!

The Tribune prides itself on being ultra-modern, totally not square and committed to remaining ahead of the media pack in reporting on all things primo and hip. We recommend that readers check back daily to get…


AlphaGo — Swedish Sports Personality of The Year 2016

Stig Toolessenn reports from Princeton NJ, USA In a interview given to TTT on condition of anonymity, Stig Huugenscholler, Chairman of the nominating committee for the coveted Swedish “Spurrts Perrsonaltisch um Yurrt” (Sports Personality of…